star of bethlehem

"Winters' Jewels" by This Year's Girl
We cannot begin perfectly... there is confusion, messiness, untidiness - and constant dichotomy, constant reference point. But at least, we are moving in the direction of unconditional being. We are gazing at the star of Bethlehem on the horizon. It is far, far away, but still there is hope. A spark of luminosity is there. The land may be dark, the sky may be gray and black. It might be chilly, and we might be cold, uncomfortable, tired, and restless. But nevertheless, the star of Bethlehem is over there. Human beings hope. The final hope that human beings could ever be hopeful of is enlightenment, the star of Bethlehem on the horizon.

The Path is the Goal: A Basic Handbook of Buddhist Meditation,
The Star of Bethlehem, edited by Sherab Chodzin

the office: the kiss

In honor of Season 3's premiere tonight,
I give you... "The Kiss":

I set my clock by The Office.
And so should you.

einstein's dreams: 14 may 1905

Those not quite at dead center do indeed move, but at the pace of glaciers. A brush of the hair might take a year, a kiss might take a thousand. While a smile is returned, seasons pass in the outer world. While a child is hugged, bridges rise. While a goodbye is said, cities crumble and are forgotten.

And those who return to the outer world... Children grow rapidly, forget the centuries-long embrace from their parents, which to them lasted but seconds. Children become adults, live far from their parents, live in their own houses, learn ways of their own, suffer, pain, grow old. Children curse their parents for trying to hold them forever, curse time for their own wrinkled skin and hoarse voices. These now old children also want to stop time, but at another time. They want to freeze their own children at the center of time.

Lovers who return find their friends are long gone. After all, lifetimes have passed. They move in a world they do not recognize. Lovers who return still embrace in the shadows of buildings, but now their embraces seem empty and alone. Soon they forget the centuries-long promises, which to them lasted only seconds. They become jealous even among strangers, say hateful things to each other, lose passion, drift apart, grow old and alone in a world they do not know.

Some say it is best not to go near the center of time. Life is a vessel of sadness, but it is noble to live life, and without time there is no life. Others disagree. They would rather have an eternity of contentment, even if that eternity were fixed and frozen, like a butterfly mounted in a case.

"14 May 1905" excerpt #3, from Einstein's Dreams by Alan Lightman.

einstein's dreams: 14 may 1905

And so, at the place where time stands still, one sees parents clutching their children, in a frozen embrace that will never let go. The beautiful young daughter with blue eyes and blond hair will never stop smiling the smile she smiles now, will never lose this soft pink glow on her cheeks, will never grow wrinkled or tired, will never get injured, will never unlearn what her parents have taught her, will never know evil, will never leave her room with the view of the ocean, will never stop touching her parents as she does now.

And at the place where time stands still, one sees lovers kissing in the shadows of buildings, in a frozen embrace that will never let go. The loved one will never take his arms from where they are now, will never give back the bracelet of memories, will never journey from from his lover, will never place himself in danger in self-sacrifice, will never fail to show his love, will never become jealous, will never fall in love with someone else, will never lose the passion of this instant in time.

One must consider that these statues are illuminated by only the most feeble red light, for light is diminished almost to nothing at the center of time, its vibrations slowed to echoes in vast canyons, its intensity reduced to the faint glow of fireflies.

"14 May 1905" excerpt #2, from Einstein's Dreams by Alan Lightman.

einstein's dreams: 14 may 1905

There is a place where time stands still. Raindrops hang motionless in air. Pendulums of clocks float mid-swing. Dogs raise their muzzles in silent howls. Pedestrians are frozen the dusty streets, their legs cocked as if held by strings. The aromas of dates, mangoes, coriander, cumin are suspended in space.

As a traveler approaches this place from any direction, he moves more and more slowly. His heartbeats grow farther apart, his breathing slackens, his temperature drops, his thoughts diminish, until he reaches dead center and stops. For this is the center of time. From this place, time travels outward in concentric circles -- at rest at the center, slowly picking up speed at greater diameters.

Who would make pilgrimage to the center of time? Parents with children, and lovers.

"14 May 1905" excerpt #1, from the enchanting Einstein's Dreams by Alan Lightman.
This and the next two posts are best if read out loud. And slowly.

love doubled

Desire doubled is love; love doubled is madness.

Prodicus, 15th century Sophist

let it be

When I find myself in times of trouble,
Mother Mary comes to me,
Speaking words of wisdom: "Let it be."
And in my hour of darkness
She is standing right in front of me,
Speaking words of wisdom, "Let it be."

Let it be. Let it be. Let it be. Let it be.
Whisper words of wisdom: Let it be.

And when the broken hearted people
Living in the world agree,
There will be an answer: Let it be.
For though they may be parted,
There is still a chance that they will see;
There will be an answer: Let it be.

Let it be, let it be...

And when the night is cloudy,
There is still a light that shines on me.
Shine on 'til tomorrow. Let it be.
I wake up to the sound of music...
mother Mary comes to me...
Speaking words of wisdom: "Let it be."

Let It Be, The Beatles

einstein's dreams: 3 march 1905

Consider a world in which cause and effect are erratic. Sometimes the first precedes the second, sometimes the second the first. Or perhaps cause lies forever in the past while effect in the future, but future and past are entertwined. [...] In this world, artists are joyous. Unpredictability is the life of their paintings, their music, their novels. They delight in events not forecasted, happenings without explanation, retrospective.

Most people have learned how to live in the moment. The argument goes that if the past has uncertain effect on the present, there is no need to dwell on the past. And if the present has little effect on the future, present actions need not be weighed for their consequence. Rather, each act is an island in time, to be judged on its own. Families comfort a dying uncle not because of a likely inheritance, but because he is loved at that moment. Employees are hired not because of their resumes, but because of their good sense in interviews. Clerks trampled by their bosses fight back at each insult, with no fear for their future. It is a world of impulse. It is a world of sincerity. It is a world in which every word spoken speaks just to that moment, every glance given has only one meaning, each touch has no past or not future, each kiss is a kiss of immediacy.

"3 March 1905" excerpt, from the enchanting Einstein's Dreams by Alan Lightman.

on turning ten

Photograph "With Balloons" by Michelle Black
The whole idea of it makes me feel
like I'm coming down with something,
something worse than any stomach ache
or the headaches I get from reading in bad light--
a kind of measles of the spirit,
a mumps of the psyche,
a disfiguring chicken pox of the soul.

You tell me it is too early to be looking back,
but that is because you have forgotten
the perfect simplicity of being one
and the beautiful complexity introduced by two.
But I can lie on my bed and remember every digit.
At four I was an Arabian wizard.
I could make myself invisible
by drinking a glass of milk a certain way.
At seven I was a soldier, at nine a prince.

But now I am mostly at the window
watching the late afternoon light.
Back then it never fell so solemnly
against the side of my tree house,
and my bicycle never leaned against the garage
as it does today,
all the dark blue speed drained out of it.

This is the beginning of sadness, I say to myself,
as I walk through the universe in my sneakers.
It is time to say good-bye to my imaginary friends,
time to turn the first big number.

It seems only yesterday I used to believe
there was nothing under my skin but light.
If you cut me I could shine.
But now when I fall upon the sidewalks of life,
I skin my knees. I bleed.

"On Turning Ten," by Billy Collins

lego deathstar canteen

This video is near and dear to me. It's a lego reenactment of one of Eddie Izzard's best sketches: The Deathstar Canteen. And you can see the original production by clicking here.

postsecret: vii

postsecret

My secret: I make wishes like this too. In fact, I also make them at 12:21, 1:23, and 3:33 and other triplets.

The wishes I make never come true. Never.

agnostic buddhism

We may have a great deal of scientific understanding about oak trees, but that knowledge in itself, and our access to that information, is not going to speed up the growth of oak trees. Historically, we can see that Buddhism has never managed to root itself in any culture until several generations have passed. This is a sobering reminder for individualistic Westerners who are proud of their capacity to solve problems quickly. We prefer to think that some bright spark will sooner or later figure out what needs to be done to create a Western Buddhism, rather than emphasising our own doing of it, our own cultivation of the wisdom and compassion that are at the core of Buddhism. Perhaps we have really to trust in the practice and find the humility to accept that we will probably not live to see a Western Buddhism. Maybe our children will, or our children's children. We need to acknowledge that we live in a time of transition, a time in which the Dharma is in crisis in Asia, and yet has not really found its feet here. It's an exciting time to be in: one in which something is being created, and we are the participants in that creation.

From a talk by Stephen Batchelor, author of Buddhism Without Beliefs and other Buddhist reflections.

To read the entirety of his talk, please visit the Western Chad Fellowship page.

the lives of others, an ode

A photographic ode to the most beautiful, most graceful,
most heart-wrenching, most flawless film made since I was born.

a train went through a burial gate

A train went through a burial gate,
A bird broke forth and sang,
And trilled, and quivered, and shook his throat
Till all the churchyard rang;

And then adjusted his little notes,
And bowed and sang again.
Doubtless, he thought it meet of him
To say good-by to men.

Emily Dickinson
Image by ThisYearsGirl, entitled "The Wing Collector."

el laberinto del fauno

Opening lines...

Fauno: A long time ago, in the underground realm, where there are no lies or pain, there lived a Princess who dreamed of the human world. She dreamed of blue skies, soft breeze, and sunshine. One day, eluding her keepers, the Princess escaped. Once outside, the brightness blinded her and erased every trace of the past from her memory. She forgot who she was and where she came from. Her body suffered cold, sickness, and pain. Eventually, she died. However, her father, the King, always knew that the Princess' soul would return, perhaps in another body, in another place, at another time. And he would wait for her, until he drew his last breath, until the world stopped turning...

From the beloved film, Pan's Labyrinth.

descartes, diderot, dumarsais

Like a man who walks alone and in darkness, I resolved to go slowly, and to use so much circumspection in everything, that if I did not advance speedily, at least I should keep from falling.

René Descartes, from Discourse on Method
Image: "Counting the Stars"


We have been heartened by the ever so consoling and agreeable idea that people may speak to one another about us too, when we shall no longer be alive; we have been encouraged by hearing from the mouths of a few of our contemporaries a certain voluptuous murmur that suggests what may be said of us by those happy and educated men in whose interests we have sacrificed ourselves, whom we esteem and whom we love, even though they have not yet been born. [...] These people do not realize that they occupy only a single point on our globe and that they will endure only a moment in its existence. To this point and to this moment they would sacrifice the happiness of future ages and that of the entire race.

Denis Diderot, from the entry "Encylopédie"
Image: "In My Other Life"


Reason is to the philosopher what grace is to the Christian. Grace causes the Christian to act, reason the philosopher.

Other men are carried away by their passions, their actions not being preceded by reflection: these are the men who walk in darkness. On the other hand, the philosopher, even in his passions, acts only after reflection; he walks in the dark, but with a torch.

Cesar Chesneau Dumarsais, from the entry "Philosopher" in the Encyclopédie
Image: "The Gravity of Fear"
Note: All images are by the artist Temporary Peace.

dead like me

George: We lead our lives, and when they end, sometimes we leave a little of ourselves behind. Sometimes we leave money, a painting, sometimes we leave a kind word. And sometimes, we leave an empty space.

George: I'd say I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I'm not. I excel at not giving a shit. Experience has taught me that interest begets expectation, and expectation beget disappointment, so the key to avoiding disappointment is to avoid interest. A equals B equals C Equals A, or whatever. I also don't have a lot of interest in being a good person or a bad person. From what I can tell, either way, you're screwed. Bad people are punished by society's laws, and good people are punished by Murphy's Law. So you see my dilemma.

George: Well, I want my life back!
Betty: It's not like you were doing anything with it.

Daisy Adair: You know, George, you have your very own saint.
George: I'd rather have a pony.

simpsons, tetris

Two of my favorite things: Star Wars and The Simpsons!

And, because I haven't posted a youtube video in a while (and because I have a silly sense of humor), here's Human Tetris (watch the whole thing to build up momentum):